Pardon me while I preen over the fate and karma of yet another righteous righty from Colorado Springs.
The infamous and very former El Paso County Sheriff “Happy Pants” Terry Maketa was back at the county jail Wednesday. But this time he had his shirt on and was smiling for his mug shot instead of his bae after being indicted by a grand jury for a list of charges as big as Pike’s Peak.
Maketa — well-known for his fiery consternations against the evils of gun control, liberals, gun grabbers, liberals, anti-constitutionalists, gun-grabbing state lawmakers, lying, thieving liberals and gun control — is accused of extortion, false imprisonment, kidnapping and official misconduct. Of course he’s better known for getting caught with his pants down with subordinate employees and sending some snazzy shirtless pics to one of his boos.
Aside from this, sort of, what’s up with the water in Colorado Springs that these righty-flighty types keep cropping up and crapping out? The likes of Maketa, Douglas Bruce, Gordon “Dr. Chaps” Klingenschmitt, Ted Haggard and Congressman Doug “Tar Baby” Lamborn seem too much to be a coincidence. As to Maketa’s 11-page grand jury indictment, it didn’t specifically refer to the fiasco reporters at the Colorado Springs Gazette exposed after Sheriff Schnookums reached out for benefits from friends at work.
Previous investigations revealed that Maketa had affairs with three deputies, mishandled internal affairs, removed oversight from his budget and “offered an endorsement to a sheriff candidate in exchange for personal favors,” according to a story by the Associated Press.
After the truth and consequences came out, he refused to quit for months, and the county has so far since paid a few hundred thousand dollars to settle lawsuits against Bae & Co. His response when the sordid truth came out the inevitable became obvious?
“I have performed and risen to the level and beyond what the community has expected,” Maketa said, according to the Gazette. Actually, his indictment and processing at jail this week is what a lot of people were expecting.
But this was hardly Maketa’s first clown rodeo. Before he was the face in the bathroom selfie, the Sheriff of Nuttingham was the face of an effort by a posse of rural sheriffs to sue Colorado. The slingers of the law wanted to rake state Democrat legislators for enacting two gun laws, which did little more than grab a few headlines and never anybody’s gun.
His grace had long been railing against the liberal toads who dared to dabble in gun legislation soon after the Aurora theater shooting and Sandy Hook School Massacre.
Among the rabble on his website while he wore a shiny star:
“We also need to be focusing on our children and the influences they are exposed to and who and what is shaping their conceptual and analytical skills. (Whatever the hell that means — DP) They should be exposed to positive role models that increase their respect and appreciation for human life. They should not be consumed with influences or activities that devalue a human life….Instead of the Federal Government, mainly Congress, continuing to engage in activities of which they have no authority and erodes our constitutional rights, we should focus on criminals and those who are most likely to commit acts of violence and not target the law abiding patriots of our nation.”
Perhaps he and fellow English-As-A-Second-Language Expert Sarah Palin could be a plausible alternative to Donald Trump for prez and vice.
I guess, however, that Maketa and I would now agree that people like him do set a poor example for children and give all of us in the media a healthy sense of job security. If the press didn’t tell you what was going on in Colorado Springs, who would?
Follow @EditorDavePerry on Twitter and Facebook or reach him at 303-750-7555 or [email protected]